College fun, part I of III

With the new school year about to start up again, lots of you will be having new roommates. How about some fun? Carry out the following for guaranteed entertainment. I’ve tried two of them already.

For more sensible advice though, check out these tips from MSN Encarta.

1. Twitch a lot.
2. Talk while pretending to be asleep.
3. Move your roommate's personal effects around. Start subtly. Gradually work up to big things, and eventually glue everything s/he owns to the ceiling.
4. Recite entire movie scripts (e.g. "The Road Warrior," "Repo Man," "Casablanca") almost inaudibly.
5. Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks."
6. Smile. All the time.
7. Burn all your waste paper while eyeing your roommate suspiciously.
8. Leave a declaration of war on your roommate's desk. Include a list of grievances.
9. Hide your underwear and socks in your roommate's closet. Accuse him/her of stealing it.
10. Whenever your roommate walks in, wait one minute and then stand up. Announce that you are going to take a shower. Do so. Keep this up for three weeks.
11. Paint your half of the room black. Or paisley.
12. Whenever s/he is about to fall asleep, ask questions that start with "Did you ever wonder why...." Be creative.
13. Shelve all your books with the spines facing the wall. Complain loudly that you can never find the book that you want.
14. Listen to radio static.
15. Cry a lot.
16. Send secret admirer notes on your roommate's e-mail.
17. Whenever your roommate comes in from the shower, lower your eyes and giggle to yourself.
18. Whenever his/her parents call and ask for your roommate, breathe into the phone for 5 seconds then hang up.
19. Call safety & security whenever your roommate turns up his/her music.
20. Follow him/her around on weekends.
21. Whenever your roommate is walking through the room, bump into him/her.
22. Stare at your roommate for five minutes out of every hour. Don't say anything, just stare.
23. Skip to the bathroom.
24. Whenever you're on the phone and s/he walks in, hang up immediately without saying anything and crawl under your desk. Sit there for two minutes, then call whoever it was back.
25. Insist on writing the entire lyrics to American Pie on your ceiling above your bed. Sing them every night before you go to bed.
26. Burn incense.
27. Don't ever flush.
28. Buy potato crisps with all your money. Stack the bags in the middle of the room in a pyramid. Eat them whenever your roommate is in the room. For every one you eat, offer your roommate one, each time telling him, "No one can eat just one."
29. Give your roommate's clothes to the Salvation Army.